Welcome to my Blog
I write a new blog almost daily! Feel free to comment, share, and connect with me! I love hearing from my readers!
Welcome to my Blog
I write a new blog almost daily! Feel free to comment, share, and connect with me! I love hearing from my readers!
Some people look at themselves in the mirror and see what’s really there
Some of those people are judgmental of what they see and some aren’t
Some people look in the mirror and don’t see reality, but rather a contorted image of themselves
People with body dysmorphia tend to hone in and focus on “flaws” or things that draw their attention and make them out to be way bigger than they really are
For example, some people become so obsessive about how a facial feature looks that they get super self conscious about it, want to change it, feel like everyone is staring at it, or like it’s the first thing people see—this happens a lot with blemishes but can also be seen in people who continue to get surgery without ever finding happiness with that structure
Similarly, people who express body image issues tend to see their body way differently than it is OR obsess on one specific area (let’s take the stomach for example)
They might constantly stare at it, pinch it, think it is huge, check it in the mirror, pull at their clothing, cover it up, deny compliments of any change, and become so concerned with its appearance to others
But how and why is this happening?
While earning my degree in Psychology I learned about perception, which really is everything
Perception is how we take in stimuli, process it, and then do something with it like form a belief or make a statement or take an action
It’s influenced by the sensory input like something smelling a certain way and then experiences, knowledge, thought patterns, environment, conditioning, culture, memory, witnessing others experiences; basically all the ways we experience the world around us so maybe that smell is actually very nostalgic to you but to someone else REEKS of an ex
So the reason some people judge their body differently than others can come from their conditioning or worldview which is not just a product of their own choosing but people, ads, culture, & the things I previously listed all around them weaving into the subconscious & of course past experiences like being called fat by peers at a young age & associating this with being bad, ugly, & undesirable then carrying that with you for life (UNTIL YOU ADDRESS IT OF COURSE—because you can change these things)
But it’s also sometimes genetic, or even because of the way someone brains functions differently than someone else’s
Some studies have shown that people with BDD that leads to disordered eating have different activation in their neural networks & some even show inhibited spatial organization or body orientation
I hope that this provides some perspective and hope for you if you’re struggling to know that even if it feels like something is “wrong with” you or you are exhibiting some of these unhealthy behaviors that you’re only just recently becoming aware of, the good news is YOU CAN CHANGE❤️🧠💆🏻♀️
What if I told you that letting go of control is what will bring you the freedom and peace of mind you’re really looking for?
What if control became associated with conscious decision making rather than consistent restraint?
What if you chose even for a moment to release all the definitions, actions, & thoughts associated with controlling your body, your food, your life...what would be different?
What if the thought of giving up control didn’t make you feel anxious but empowered you instead?
What if you challenged everything you’ve been taught to believe about health, weight, your body, size, shape, food, eating...?
What if when you stand in front of a mirror the reflection you see is actually reality & you realize you’re allowed to love the way you look now?
What if you felt everything in your life so deeply and chose to heal it without stigma, that there was never a need to turn to external sources like food or exercise or restriction to feel in control of your life?
What if you just decided right now to release the rules, expectations, & fears of judgment so you could feel truly free? ❤️
Really, what’s the worst that could happen?
If you’re struggling now, trying the same thing over and over to feel a sense of control, beauty, fulfillment, validation, happiness, or you name it... what harm can really come from committing to a new way of thinking?
What if you changed your thoughts, beliefs, actions, and habits despite the pain, pushback, doubts, fear, and chaos that it can evoke within you and it actually changed the entire course of the rest of your life?
You are SO deserving of more love my friends, give yourself permission to give to yourself and receive it from yourself
Want actionable mindset tools that you can use on prep or in your improvement season to immediately shift your emotional & mental state?
Join my On Demand Mindset Coaching Platform now to get access to exercises, tools, & mentorship at your fingertips on topics including;
Learn about how it works & Enroll now by clicking HERE💜🧠
If you created your current reality, you can create a new one
Your normal might consist of being unhappy, sad, ashamed, full of guilt, empty, hurt, angry, or numb
Your normal might be full of unsurprising events with some sort of lusting for a life that “could be but likely never will be”
Your normal might feel uneasy, unpredictable, scary
But it doesn’t always have to be this way and the only way it wouldn’t change is if you don’t
Your next normal could be entirely different from your current narrative
Change the way you think
When you change the way your brain is wired, you’re inevitably going to be changing your actions, when you change your actions your results change and when your results change so does your experience of life
It’s no longer feeling like something so far out of reach but now like something you can always take hold of and steer any which way you desire
I don’t just say this as a psychology and personal development nerd
Despite literature of more reliable case studies, eons of anecdotal evidence, and the mere fact that our brain is literally the epicenter of our functions...
I’ve also witnessed it first hand
I haven’t been deeply depressed or suicidal (something I never thought I’d be able to rid myself of) in years
Because of this my anxiety has also decreased massively as I’m no longer fearful of myself or my thoughts
While I’ve always been a VERY optimistic person (sometimes too much for my own good they say)
My life has dramatically improved since making myself a priority
I always had goals and dreams and chased them relentlessly whether it was athletics or school or career
(Fun fact I even started my first business at 9 years old and carried on with the thought of pursuing that profession until junior year of high school! Can you guess what that was?)
But the difference is now I feel like ME and I love this me because she is such a pure light form of who I’ve always known I could be
When I would get depressed it scared me so much because I knew it “wasn’t me” I can remember being so enamored by the thought of death and yet feeling like I was just trapped in my own sad chemical ridden brain, I’d always give people support for their concern of me by saying “but it’s not me don’t worry it just comes over me, idk what it is”
Even though it wasn’t my fault that this would happen, I had a LOT of responsibility to take
And if I stopped EVERY positive thing I do for my mind now, I know it wouldn’t be long until I regressed to a dark and scary version of me
Want to know some of the things that made the biggest difference for me?
Here’s 10 just to scratch the surface:
Happiness can be tapped into the same way sadness can. This doesn’t mean you never experience any other emotions, it just means your baseline is more content, at peace, happy :)
Imagine what will happen when you start chasing the idea of “being happy” and instead choose to simply become happiness
If you aren’t loving what you see in the mirror post-show, remember that this phase is different & looks different for everyone!
Maybe you don’t look how you thought you would, how others do, or how you expected to; but how you look is exactly how you are supposed to right now & comparison won’t change that
If you’re doing everything you can to progress, you‘ll be okay!
Give yourself some credit for all the actions you are taking to improve & don’t let that be wasted on negativity
You deserve to love your body in ALL stages
If you don’t love her now, when she is showing up for you daily to grow, then what do you expect her to do when it is time to prep again?
In your improvement season you have to have NEW standards & expectations for yourself
It may be unrealistic for you to keep your abs showing ALL year, so give yourself some grace & stop fighting for that
A thigh gap? When you have only ever had that during peak week, yeah let it go babe you need to grow!
You might be trying to restore your hormones or body’s overall functions & that can’t happen if you keep trying to look like the version of you that was unbalanced
Just because someone else is only 5lbs up from stage weight doesn’t mean you have to or even should!!
Even if your coach has expressed an expectation, it doesn’t mean it will be your reality
Expectations are not laws; they are more like predictions
If you are working with your coach, express to them your new standards too so they can be on the same page or develop some with you
This journey is so much more empowering when you commit to loving yourself unconditionally!
Trust me, growing season goes by so fast & you are going to fall in love with your body
When you do you’ll be so glad you didn’t hop back on prep just to ‘get leaner’ or ‘lose this excess fat’ or ‘get control back’
Settle in, find a new normal, & be OK with it, even if it looks different from others
For guidance on exactly what you can do to improve your body image click here to learn more & join my on demand mindset coaching platform for competitors for instant access to 45+ modules on mindset based on YOUR current circumstances or season🧠💆🏻♀👑
One of the best parts about improving is that no one can do it for you
Not a coach, therapist, mentor, friend, partner, stranger, not even a crystal ball, card deck, or the moon
You’re going to have to commit to it for yourself, because others can only take you so far!
Whether you’re going to school, working on physique goals, trying to heal yourself internally, making your mindset work for you, improving your relationship with food, changing how you see & talk to yourself, making a relationship better, creating relationships, being comfortable with yourself...
WHATEVER THE GROWTH YOU’RE SEEKING IS; it isn’t going to happen on its own
& again, that’s the best part
You have to implement the help you receive, coaching or mentorship you invest in, events you go to, books you read, journaling or meditation, ALL of it is up to you
AND it’s amazing how just going through the motions isn’t even enough, you have to really frikkin do the work
Growth is in essence the stretching or expansion of yourself in some way shape or form
So it’s not meant to feel “normal” because then it’s probably just maintenance work, not real developmental work
I‘m grateful for the clients I have who see the benefit to implementing the work we do that they invested in
I have so many success stories because I‘m lucky enough to attract clients who aren’t afraid to put the work in
Makes sense since many of them are competitors, moms, military, students, biz owners...ok yep they’re all badass
But the deal is, The clients of mine who genuinely execute(d) between 80-100% of the work we do, I give them, we agree on, or I set them up with in a program, succeed at what appears to others to be mind boggling levels in record time (I don’t mess around lol)
But the ones who sit on their hands, don’t communicate with me, make excuses, tell me they haven’t done the action steps...well it takes a bit longer for them to get to the light at the end of the tunnel & I WISH I could do the work for them but I can’t & it would be the greatest disservice of all
Feeling inspired to make a 🧠 shift? Contact me now to see it & how we can work together 😊❤️☕️💆🏻♀️
You have to really love this sport to succeed, Agree?
I don’t mean love it just to become a crowned champion with swords, trophies, medals, and tiaras
I mean love it to be a real champion for it
Have a passion that transcends the bounds of excuses, judgement, or difficulty
The kind of love for the sport that can acknowledge what’s required, bring that to the stage, & even when not rewarded in the physical sense, you can still feel validated because you love the journey you’ve been on
Loving this sport isn’t all about the vanity or the potential for a title or opportunity
But loving the community, the discipline, the hardship, & the standards
I think this is key for success in the sport because success is really about fulfilling a need or desire for feeling accomplished
Of course, have that pro card in mind, picture yourself getting that olympia qualification, imagine being crowned overall champion
But have a deeper reason for all of it so even if the dream isn’t realized you still feel accomplished
Because when it comes time to do your incline sprints, plyos, meal prep, macro calculation, posing practice, eating the same thing again & again, turning down food or events, being questioned by people, say no / yes to opportunities, paying $, working through mental issues, immersing yourself in the nature of the sport
The only thing that’s really going to keep you going is loving this
Knowing why you want to achieve something will allow you to feel more connected to the pursuit of it & loving the pursuit of it is what’ll keep you going regardless of results
We know this sport challenges us mentally, physically, & emotionally but the lifestyle itself can exist (to a degree) without the stage
You can learn or have many of the lessons you eventually learn revealed to you through other outlets
It doesn’t take competing to ‘get a rush’
‘see how far you can push yourself’
‘be an example for others’
*insert every valuable lesson this sport gives us athletes*
& for those reasons, there has to be a reason you CHOOSE bodybuilding day in & day out
SO WHAT IS YOUR REASON?
Never underestimate the power of radical honesty on your personal growth and development
Telling yourself the truth, acknowledging the truth, and even dissecting it can help you to set better expectations, learn new lessons, and improve as a person
It is important to be honest with yourself so when you do take an action step or commit to a goal it is coming from a place of full understanding
Otherwise you’ll either constantly disappoint yourself or hold yourself back
It can be a difficult thing to do because it means we have to actually acknowledge areas in our life or our mind that we don’t normally dare to drum anything up in
It’s much safer to coast through without acknowledging that there’s a lie to be worked through or a truth to be discover
Because that requires a new level of awareness, self-love, and of course attention to detail
It also requires us to put the ego on the shelf for a bit to really move through it which on a conscious level is hard enough so when we have to bring the subconscious issues to the surface, it can feel like picking off a scab that’s just finally started to heal!
Sometimes we need to give ourselves space to really recognize the truths in our lives as well as those things we think are truth but really have no evidence
Maybe you need to be honest about how much time you really have to commit to something?
Or how much effort you’re actually putting in vs need to be?
Or that you are struggling and it is ok?
Or succeeding and that is ok?
Friendships or relationships that need TLC or to be cut off?
Goals that need revamping?
What is the truth you need to hear?
Be careful to find evidence that supports that truth outside of your own mind and emotions
Be objective with yourself so you can take emotion out of it and focus on pure growth and opportunity
So what’s yours? Feel free to share below or let me know when you’ve given some thought into this, always happy to support you with accountability 😊❤️
BUILD MORE THAN JUST A BODY LIVE EVENT REEL😍😭❤️
I would love to invite you to join me & 12 other women in LA on January 26th from 9am-2pm for the next Workshop!
I promise you, when you leave the room you’re going to be SO glad you came
Not just because you learned new personal development & psychology based tools to have your most fulfilling improvement seasons & preps
Or because you’ll have a mini toolbox of exercises you can do for your body image, self-love, food relationship, & even daily development
& definitely not just because you’ll have had the opportunity to ask questions, get answers, & experience an internal transformation
BUT REALLY because of the connections you will make
I am amazed & grateful to see that the women who came to this event STILL talk almost every day in our cute lil group chat
They share wins, struggles, funny stories, & ask questions
Even just yesterday we got a message from an attendee celebrating 7 weeks binge free!
This event is not just a 9am-2pm massive inner work deep dive & a kiss on the cheek bye bye forever
The women who show up, I truly believe, are there not just to transform their own relationship with food, their body, or their goals
But also to help facilitate that transformation within the other souls that come
While I am leading the event & guiding you through life changing exercises and providing you some of my favorite tools for inner growth, there is so much magic in having other women hold space for you, share experiences, open up about their lifestyles, & just be real
I usually get social anxiety even thinking about having to go out & meet new people, which you probably wouldn’t think based on the work I do
But it’s true! & that’s why as the host, I am committed to cultivating a warm, loving, welcoming environment for all attendees
From immersing myself into personal development to getting my degree in Psychology & now studying Clinical Mental Health Counseling for my Masters, I can honestly say nothing has been as influential in my journey as the inner work
I can’t wait to share that with you😍
Want to come?
Visit: http://www.celestial.fit/live-events.html to see upcoming events and put a request in for your area!🧠😊
Saying No Thank You to Food Doesn't Mean You Think It's Inherently Bad or Off-Limits Forever; Handling Criticism & Gaining Confidence in your Choices
In bodybuilding, you have to be prepared to say “no, thank you” to food
Having the confidence to say no comes from having confidence in your choice
The less you feel the need to explain yourself, the less stress you’ll be under & the less people will ask you to explain
When it comes to eating, at any point of your journey as an athlete or human, sometimes you’re just not in the mood, not hungry, don’t like it, or it makes you sick, does that make you a bad person? NO, it’s just food
The only reason people treat you differently for saying no is because you’re doing it as a “diet” which means you’re choosing to say no when you could be saying yes with the rest of them
We cannot blame people for wanting to enjoy a meal with us but we can fulfill their need to feel connected to us by being present with them
Like Joining them out, encouraging them to enjoy, reminding them how happy you are to be there, & engaging in fruitful conversation
Many people also just eat out of habit so they can’t understand why you wouldn’t too
A habit to eat the m&ms at work, the food brought in by surprise, the full dinner served, the snacks, the samples, & it can all serve as a multifaceted experience, not just eating & that’s okay too!! Food, in my opinion, is not just fuel
At least not in the biological sense alone
I believe it is fuel for nutritional, life, value, and personal goals
It’s fuel for fun, satisfaction, health, healing, celebration, community, tradition, human senses, experiences, you name it
But as a competitor, you’re eating to literally fuel your aesthetic goals, recovery, energy, & optimal function
While you don’t have to explain your decision to eat or not eat something, you may have to help people understand your decisions
The point is, it’s okay to say no because if you’re athletic goals as much as it’s okay for someone else to say no because they’re just not in the mood or they’ve just eaten
Celebrate the opportunity to choose & express gratitude for people who ask questions because it’s not all coming from a bad place, sometimes they just to feel connected to you & express that they care💓😊🧠
Not every athlete is willing to take the time to shine light on the dark places
Not every competitor is going to place as much emphasis on their mindset as they do their training and nutrition
Not every competitor will see the benefit to stopping and addressing the limiting beliefs that are holding them back
Not every athlete acknowledges that their inner peace, confidence, beliefs, and thoughts will consistently influence their behavior and results
Not everyone wants to wake up early to journal or meditate or pause and ask themselves questions before they eat or set aside time to reflect on their day when they are feeling extra tired
Not every athlete is going to bring mindfulness to every meal, training session, thought, prep, or improvement season
But at $9.99/month any competitor who wants to take it to the next level can!
By using the on demand mindset coaching platform competitors like you receive instant access to mentorship, support, and guidance through any challenge they are facing on and off the stage
Whether you’re in your prep, improvement season, or taking time off, your mindset will either be your best asset or your worst enemy
Click HERE to learn more, join the platform, and connect with other competitors who are Building More than Just a Body