MY REAL & RAW LIFE UPDATE: Treat Your Body Like the Enemy, and it Will ALWAYS work Against you, Treat Your Body Like your Ally and it will Always Work WITH You

​Treat your body like the enemy, and it will always work against you. Treat your body like your ally and it will always work with you. 

MY REAL & RAW LIFE UPDATE...

I have been learning so much after my most recent show and am still learning as I go. One thing that’s for sure is I have found so much peace in taking time every day to write or think up statements like this, formulate beliefs that serve me, and transform any loatheful thoughts into loving ones.
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In order for me to be able to do what I love, my body has to begin functioning the way it’s meant to. If I don’t take care of myself with loving actions, thoughts, and belief patterns then it will not allow me to do what I love when I want to do it.
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I need to start decreasing my cardio, upping my food intake, and recomping my body without going so far that I’m doing a cut that kills me heading into another show.
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My body hasn’t had a menstrual cycle (period) in 2 years aside from one that was forced by my doctor with the prescription of progesterone for 10 days. This got my period to show up but then it was never to be found again lol. Even though this is pretty common and doesn’t necessarily mean problems for everyone, I still have to get it in check and my coach actually wants me to regulate it before I compete again.
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Now imagine for one second, you haven’t had your period in 2 years, you’re already up 10 pounds from stage weight (and advised not to go too much more), you are told you also need to begin packing on Muscle and decrease cardio (which will cause a shift likely to create recomp which is good but can require lots of self loving thoughts w some fat gain that comes with it), oh and you want to compete in February but with the way your body is functioning you have to regain hope and belief that your period will come back and regulate, your body fat will not surpass muscle growth in a way that creates more struggle than progress, and all this must be managed in a matter of a few short months...
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I am embracing this challenge as I go forward in my lifestyle and in my journey. More to come...more to share.

I’m learning to be more kind to myself, to be okay with the things I need to do, and begin treating what I have left untreated for so long. And reminding myself I am capable & everything is always working out as it’s meant to.
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I am finally seeing my doctor on Tuesday to get an action plan in place for what i shared in my last post. I am realizing that putting off treatment could now have hindered my growth and opportunity moving forward. This is my reminder for EVERYTHING In life, especially with all of this... to do the damn thing, the damn thing you know, in fact, every damn thing, and once the damn things are done, KEEP GOING!
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I have to accept what comes with the actions I NEED to take and take full responsibility knowing that if I don’t take them, I will only suffer the consequences moving forward.
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Now, listening, honoring, and loving my body is taking on a whole new meaning. I’m letting go of shame, guilt, comparison, and pride when it comes to the way I look, and remembering that this is MY life...all of this is up to me...I can’t let the demons take control.
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My mind needs so much TLC too, competing has been so much of my focus that after my last show a lot of my anxieties surfaced. I have decided to look for a therapist again since it’s been so long since I’ve seen mine and It helped me so much when I was depressed, suicidal, and anxious. There’s no shame in getting help!!! It’s better to acknowledge where help is needed than pretend things are ‘fine’ and eventually lose control / see it get worse...
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Now I must be mindful, through all of this; I MUST LOVE IN ORDER TO HEAL AND I MUST HEAL IN ORDER GROW AND I MUST GROW IN ORDER TO LIVE MY DREAMS.
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I feel the emotions, I feel them deeply, I still don’t have this all figured out. But I hope that by being real with you, you can see that I am human, I struggle, and I have to constantly address problems in my mind too...
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What’s your favorite way to overcome challenge and stimulate growth mentally, physically, & emotionally? Let’s support each other💜
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