I’ve definitely had doubts and worries and fears come in and out of my head knowing I’ll be back on stage on Saturday!
I find the battle to combat them has been harder this time than before.
Maybe because my expectations or the season ahead or hopes or because I’ve poured so much into this every day even through the darkest times of my life.
I must remember what defines me the most is my commitment and efforts and I’ve executed day in and day out which is what matters most.
After checking in today, I felt really good.
And I have a LOT to be excited about beyond the show this Saturday.
And even more to be proud of myself for.
Yesterday I cried thinking about how last year around this time I was really contemplating what all of “this” was really for after I lost my mom.
But I kept showing up for the happier future version of myself and the version of me that set this goal and dream in motion and said to herself “no matter what”.
I have worked so hard to build something better than my last.
This next show will be an amazing experience and I can’t wait to see what all the rest of the shows over the next 11 weeks brings.
I’m hoping to do 1-2 more before USAs.
I have so many things I can’t wait to share with you guys too!
This has been a HUGE mental prep for me beyond any before.
From big decisions, to body being different, to what I mentioned before, just a LOT on top of continuing to progress in my masters program and my business.
The theme I am realizing I must reinforce to myself is to be proud, be grateful, be kind, and have fun.
Not every show will be exactly what you expect and some shows you might prove yourself wrong.
So Believing in myself regardless of the critical voice in my head is important.
I know that voice serves a purpose and has helped me push, grow, evolve, learn…I also know the difference between bullying myself or supporting myself effectively with encouragement and realism.
It’s even easier to do this with the amazing support I have around me.
This sport, this journey, everything I’ve done since I started “fitness” has been to #BUILDMORETHANJUSTABODY
I’ll be doing the @spectrumfitnessproductions@musclecontest contra costa 🤗