Welcome to my Blog
I write a new blog almost daily! Feel free to comment, share, and connect with me! I love hearing from my readers!
Welcome to my Blog
I write a new blog almost daily! Feel free to comment, share, and connect with me! I love hearing from my readers!
Feeling Emotional? Ask Yourself These 4 Questions for Greater Understanding of Why and Discover What Really Needs to Be Addressed
We all can experience things differently
Sometimes what is sad for one person might be frustrating for someone else
Or what makes one person celebrate might make another person feel like a failure
Or what could be your biggest growth spurt could be someone’s worst nightmare
It’s important to allow yourself to FEEL the emotions but if you feel trapped by them, then reflecting is helpful bc it gives us perspective
There are common emotions that we can all share but their definitions by psychological standards are only what we call phenomenons
This is because they can’t be defined in such a way that everyone goes YEP
They aren’t laws, even the concept of emotion is theory based
We give power to everything we experience which is why I believe it is important to pay attention to why we are experiencing that specific emotion as a response to what’s happened
Asking these questions of myself have helped me to see deeper wounds that needed healing, thought patterns that needed shifting, lessons that needed learning, and beliefs that needed changing
The reason for each question:
Q1: helps you to even see if it requires much digging. Like getting interrupted over & over & being annoyed is pretty normal
Q2: This is to identify where the emotions might be being pulled from. If you’re feeling pissed off that someone showed up late to meet you & realize there were times in the past where your parents were always late to pick you up, you can see where the deeper attachment to anger & resentment could be coming from. Especially if it’s the other person’s first offense
Q3: Your values & beliefs drive many of your decisions and life. I get really upset when people do things that aren’t genuine because to me that’s a huge value of mine so naturally it makes sense I’d be upset
Q4: If you’ve brought your own ideals into interactions outside yourself. If you go into a meeting with an intention for positivity that’s one thing. But if your expectation is that everyone will love your idea but only some do. Then of course you’re going to have an emotional response
Reflection is the only way to find the lesson really. I hope this helps! Let me know which you like best😊
How Brittany Stopped Binging, Night Eating, & Negative Body Image to Finally Make Peace with Food and Her Body
I remember when my client Brittany first came to me a few weeks after stepping off the Arnold Amateur Stage.
She messaged me opening up about what she was experiencing post-show and how much her mind was really getting the best of her.
Brittany expressed how unhappy she was with herself, how she didn't feel comfortable in her own skin or with the weight she had gained and how she was eating post-show (binging, restricting, thinking about food alllll the time). She was terrified of gaining weight and becoming the 'bigger girl' which she was when she was a young girl and worked hard to get away from.
Brittany openly told me that she was disappointed in herself for binging, not loving herself the way she wanted to and even feeling out of integrity because she encouraged others to love themselves, and felt absolutely helpless to fixing it.
Like she says in her program review video (& below), she really didn't have high hopes coming into the program but she knew she was no longer alone and committed to working with me.
Before working with me, she had really tried hard to reverse diet despite trying to count macros or follow plans, but she found it to be very challenging.
She would find herself binging during the day and also would wake up in the middle of the night as though she was in another world and just eat and eat and eat. This was something we really focused on overcoming and were able to solve practically overnight with one simple lifestyle shift. Sorry, can't tell you what that was exactly, some of my secrets are password protected for my clients eyes and ears only ;).
The thing with Brittany is, before we started working together she would binge, then restrict, then binge, then restrict. The restriction was out of shame, guilt, and fear. After gaining 12 pounds in a month she knew she needed help but really didn't know what to do. She opened up to other people in her life but was seeking a solution, so she reached out to me.
Brittany was really at a loss as to what to do but she saw my emphasis on the importance of doing the inner work and trusted in me to help her.
I took her through my 4 week Food Relationship Healing Program with a coaching call at the 2 week mark and another at the 4 week mark.
The coaching calls is where a lot of the deeper magic happened as it allowed me to really take her through practices, exercises, and healing that were specifically for her, what she was going through at the time, things I noted from her paperwork that really needed to be moved through, and of course anything I saw in the food journal that needed to be immediately addressed.
Clients like Brittany are amazing because despite not having full faith that the problem can or would be solved, she committed to the process and invested in it. Not just financially in hiring me as her mentor, but with her time, energy, and effort.
Brittany took on everything I gave her and implemented it immediately. She was quick to see where she could have done better or been more consistent and always open for feedback. Brittany's success was not just because she followed my program, but because she was committed to it. Her honest, positive, trusting attitude throughout the entire 4 week process is what truly allowed her to make incredible progress.
After working together, she filled out my evaluation form which I send to clients upon completion of our time together. It acts as a reflection process for them, a progress chart for me, and of course a way for me to see what I can improve or emphasize within the program.
She reflected on many wins and wrote an amazing reflection:
I am truly so amazed (but not surprised) by the progress Brittany had during my 4 Week Food Relationship Healing Program for Bikini Competitors.
In her review video below she may or may not have shared some of my secrets! hahaha. Brittany got results because she was committed to resolving the pain she was in that was really running her day to day life.
If this is something you are feeling called to participate in and really commit to then fill out this form to apply for the program: https://forms.gle/VFUVJdf43FSf7aDK6
Once you hit submit I will review and reach out to you within 24 hours to chat about your specific situation in more depth, and then decide if this is the best option for you moving forward.
You can watch her review video here:
Post-show: ugh I look horrible I’m so bloated I can’t stop eating I should prep again what if the judges forget me did I even use the anabolic window am I ever gunna be able to prep again rhjffjdjdkdocn
Deep into off-season: damnnnnnnnnn!😍👀 lookin good my girl lovin’ them curves on you wooosh look at you killin it at life and all who cares about a bloat when you got your period did someone saychocolate everything works out perfectly I’m growing is that a new muscle fodjfjfisodlcjf
I know, Many of my posts lately have been emphasizing the benefit to having a healthy body image & it’s been resonating with many of you
So I felt inspired to tell you a bit about how I even got here in the first place!
I’d like to say it was the nearly 12 months off that I’ve taken from the stage that helped my mind find peace
But it wasn’t just time
I know for a fact time is an important piece of this for many competitors & so many girls run from it instead of surrendering to it
It took deep inner work, healing, reconnection, conscious thought pattern shifting, self awareness, and real deeper than surface level effort
I had to face my demons
I had to implement what I know, what I needed, and what was best for me
I had to confront the beliefs that didn’t serve me, recreate definitions for success or happiness, and call myself out on my own BS
Just because I am really frikkin good at what I do as a coach who helps women make peace with food, their body, & their goals doesn’t mean I never struggle
It’s always a conscious choice DAILY
Your days just become more and more full of love rather than loathe the more you master your mind
If you’re ready to make a real mindset shift and transform your relationship with food, your body and your goals but don’t know where to start here’s what you can do:
1. Click HERE to sign up for the free post show blues personal development coaching series where I share a bit of my signature PTG process™️
2. Cut to the chase, Email me about working with me (see my 👙 client testimonials here for more inspiration) let’s figure out what will be the best option for you
3. Continue to feel meh bleh feh wah
Absolutely loving my shape right now😊😊
I invest so much time in my body every day & my body supports my efforts. Why not celebrate that?!
I used to scroll online & think oh that’s a bikini girl and I don’t look like her therefore I’m not successful
I’d scroll down my feed thinking damn I wish I had her abs, her hamstrings, & her shoulders because then I’d be appreciated, validated, rewarded, & seen (of course this was subconscious until I became aware of it)
I would compare my physique to her & her & her & her suddenly forgetting that I was perfectly happy as I was
I would read captions that said if you’re not doing x or y or z then you are a failure
I’d hear girls say if you eat, train, prep or reverse a certain way then you’re doing it wrong
Damn, people preaching that we need to do our own thing 1 minute then the next minute they tell us if we are a certain way then we aren’t cut out for this or that
AGAIN, SAYS WHOOO!?
You know most people on the planet wake up & just live...
They don’t get caught up in everyone else’s body, or meals, or workouts
1 thing that’s freed me from all of this fluff from others is building belief in myself & true faith in MY life
I remind myself that if others compared themselves to me or what I was doing
I would know it is silly because even one small event in my life could’ve changed the trajectory of where I am now & NO ONE else has experienced life exactly as I have
Therefore, why would I have any reason to compare myself to someone else who likely has a million differences from me even if on surface level we both identify similarly as “competitor” or “business owner” or “mentor”?
It is only an identity, but the truth lies in our own unique paths that took us here to choose the identities
If you’re finding yourself in a bit of a doubt filled rut, write down some ways you have overcome doubt, fear, failure, pressure, etc
Show yourself that this soon will be something you reflect on for strength in the future
PS I have 6 seats left for my free LIVE event for bikini competitors going deep on all things inner work on 10/12 in San Diego! Click here to register now!
CHANGING PERSPECTIVE; This Is Not Your Breaking Point, It Is Your Making Point
It is easy to feel & stay overwhelmed when nothing seems to be going right for you
Changing your perspective is going to be extremely influential & is arguably the most important step to getting through it
By shifting your perspective you will be able to approach everything else with a fresh set of eyes
I like to think of challenges as ‘the moment’
We’ve all seen it happen in movies, the ‘turning point’ that is so extremely daunting for the protagonist but ends up changing the course of their life for the better
Whether that means they finally stumbled on the gold mine, bumped into the love of their life, or learned a lesson they will carry with them forever;
That moment would not have happened without the challenges they faced
Maybe this right here is what you will look back on and be grateful for, maybe this is your ‘moment’
So embrace the difficulty in what you are experiencing
Sometimes the toughest times of your life are really just your conveyor belt to the best times of your life & all you have to do is hop on for the ride
We live in a world that wants us to believe that we always have to work on ourselves because we are never good enough or won’t fulfill our potential if we don’t
But you don’t always have to ‘resolve’ everything
Sometimes the best thing you can do is be present enough in the moment to see the lessons it is teaching you rather than trying to run from it, cover it up, or pick up all the pieces super quickly
Maybe with more presence you will see something you thought was broken and discover that it has become something new, or maybe you will stumble upon your gold mine after all ☁️🌥⛅️🌤☀️🌈
Discussions of cutting have begun with my coach
I’m very happy with the plans in place right now and I’m in no rush to begin because I trust that it’ll all happen as it is meant to
The goal is really to slowly bring down body fat and weight then allow body to adapt and then pick up again
This is to avoid any health repercussions and really stay on top of making this more sustainable for me
I have been thoroughly enjoying the building phase and honestly feel I could just be here happily forever
But I also take that as a massive win. Knowing I’m going to go into a prep with a healthy mindset
Not to change my body but to do something I love to do and give my body new normals
I have had some anxiety over if I have gained any muscle, if I got the most out of this improvement season, if my body is going to support me through a prep and so on
But I remind myself how much I’ve been working for my health, for my muscles to grow, and for my inner peace
I feel and see muscles and shape I hadn’t before but also know I have a long journey ahead
Good news is I enjoy this and it won’t be terribly different than how I am already living
I want to find a place where my body is lower body fat and I feel lighter but still have optimally functioning inner health
I know it’s possible but patience is required
Luckily I’ve been forced to practice that in the past year and will continue to do so
I don’t want to get lean as fast as possible
I want to learn, find new balance, reset my body, continue to adapt, and truly find a place where I can be healthy along the way that is also sustainable for me and supports future seasons and off seasons
I am excited to see the muscles pop yet again and hopefully be much bigger and better than this pic
I have found myself in full trust of the process with complete detachment from the outcome
I know I’ll be on stage again, but I am not attached to when or how that will unfold which makes this journey more about ME & less about seeking validation or chasing anything
I’m doing this because I love it
It’s not always about the “perfect” reverse or the “perfect” prep
It’s about what you do with your situation that really counts
Bookmark this blog post and Refer to it at the End of Each Day!
Asking yourself these three questions can be a great way to reinforce positive behavior from yourself
If we continuously acknowledge ourselves for the work we are doing and the actions we take, we will be more likely to continue taking them
Think of it like a self high five 🙏🏻
I hear people say all the time “I keep going back to my old habits and behaviors after doing so well for a few days”
Well!!!! That can be attributed to many different things which when I work with people 1:1 we dig into
But first quick thing to do is make sure you are celebrating and recognizing the positive actions you are taking each day
Plus, it’s a form of accountability so if you know you’re going to be asking yourself this every day, then you’ll also be more likely to do things throughout the day to later feel good about 🥳
Try this tonight and begin making a habit out of it. Start small or go all in just do what you need to work your way up to making this part of your routine
While we’re here, might as well comment the answer to one of the questions below!⤵️
One of the worst feelings is being so ashamed of your body that you cover up & miss experiences that would be amazing
I’ve been there though. There were days I would instantly wrap up in a towel or jump in the pool before people could see me
I used to sit in a towel by the pool or not even go in
I was also made fun of for my size as a kid & it stuck with me
I was called fat names that I carried with me into young adulthood
I told myself stories like if I wasn’t super lean with a flat stomach or muscles showing then I wasn’t good enough to be seen
I used to feel like my body wasn’t aligned to my identity because my definition of the identity was based on expectations I was not ready to fulfill yet
When I got really into fitness I thought I had to live up to others expectations
Like all the girls on social media who represent fitness I thought unless I look like them then people will think I’m a fraud or a bad trainer or not fit enough to do bikini comps
I thought I was supposed to be “the fit one” so I couldn’t have any extra body fat or a bigger waist or legs
Or even after a show going from super lean to get in the pool with friends & be like yep so Im not that lean anymore
But this isn’t something I deal with as much anymore. Thoughts cross my mind sometimes but I now know how to move through it
Even taking this pic wasn’t about my body it was to document the experience
Which I enjoyed happily in a bikini as a personal development coach, as a trainer, & oh ya as a HUMAN BEING
We are many things all at once
I am someone who is healthy, cares about & for my body, but also recognizes that life is so much more enjoyable w/o always worrying about how I look or if everyone is going to think I look ‘bigger’ or ‘smaller’
Funnily enough, the people who truly LOVE & care about me just get so excited about me being healthy, happy, & living my purpose
Everyone else’s opinion or thoughts are unknown unless said. If you think someone is thinking something about you it’s a reflection of your own beliefs & thoughts of yourself
Email Me 'Self-love Workshop’ and reference this blog for free access to the replay of an exclusive training I did diving into 3 of my favorite self&body love practices
You’re not always going to look “stage ready” or “prep lean” or sometimes even the way you want to or hoped you would
BUT can you still accept your body and love yourself anyways?
I’ve been leaner & hated how I looked
I’ve been leaner & loved how I looked
I’ve had more fat & loved how I looked & hated it
I’ve seen my body super lean & ready to step on stage & have loved that look
I’ve also seen my body super flat & deflated looking
All this & I now really know how to love & accept her
From alllllll of these phases & changes over the years I’ve learned that it’s easy to go back & forth
Love for your body
Loathe for your body
Even in the same day!
& what it usually comes down to is how you treat your body, talk to and about yourself, and how you’re living
I snapped this picture this morning, on vacation celebrating my graduation & living life
I’m working out every morning with bands & body weight & loving it
& we are so active here in the mountains and exploring!
I felt so good this morning after my leg workout so I took this pic. I’m obviously super happy
Not even because it’s “the best I’ve ever looked” or “better than usual” but literally because it’s my body, we did an amazing workout & I thought I looked awesome
I love my body now, & I’ll continue to throughout the remainder of my building & soon into cutting
But I don’t do any of this for the look as much as I do for the love of the sport & what this lifestyle brings my brain & my overall sense of self
I am so committed to helping other competitors who have been in the battle or are battling with their body image
I have girls messaging me daily about their relationship with their body, food, & their goals
Post-show, prep, taking a break, thinking about competing ALL of it
& I LOVE it
It’s truly my passion work
So I’m hosting a FREE* event in San Diego on October 12, 2019 for bikini competitors who want to make peace with food, their body, & their goals as well as develop the mindset required as an athlete in a physique based sport
I have 7 spots left (forreal), if you’re interested in coming & want more info Email me with subject line 'event' now!
*$35 to reserve seat will be given back to you when you arrive 😍
The more gratitude we have for allllll the ways our body works for us, the more we become naturally inspired to take care of it!
Our body is the home for our soul. It is both separate from us and part of us
Neglecting it is neglecting yourself
Comment your dear body, thank you for ___ statement below!
Think of all the ways your body supports you in your life!
If you need any examples, I shared a little letter I wrote to my body a few years ago today that still holds true and inspired this post
Thank you... for carrying me throughout life and doing the best you can with everything that I throw at you
Thank you for keeping me healthy and safe
Thank you for allowing me to be free
I always knew I could be free within you if I let go of the blocks and limits I built for myself within my mind
I knew I could love you in all your forms and express that love through mindful living
I always loved the way you supported and continue to support me in my journey
This space is so beautiful
Thank you for giving me this human experience
Sincerely, the soul you house💖”
Comment a statement for your body below!