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 I don’t believe you have to go through hell to know that you can live with peace or light.
I don’t think you have to fight things alone to be considered strong or courageous or wise. I’ve had to ask for help with so many things in my life. The best helpers guide you to the answer that you already knew, educate, validate, support, listen, and help you in resolving problems that you haven’t yet productively coped with, while the okay helpers just give you the answer and rob you of the exploration. Getting help is nothing to be ashamed of. I think it is very courageous to ask for help. The more people I work with, whether through my business or in counseling, the more in awe I am of those who are willing to say they’re at one of, if not the, lowest points in their life and have the insight to recognize the benefit of support and then to have the vulnerability to explore how to get through this. The word that comes up for me when I see people, no matter the situation, is RESILIENCE. I say all of this because I know there are people silently struggling, thinking they have to hold it together or figure it all out on their own, if that’s you, please know that you don’t have to. You deserve to get through this and if going at it alone isn’t helping you, it’s okay to utilize resources & ask for help. My results have been accelerated when I ask for help or get educated or hire a mentor or coach. It doesn’t make me weak or incapable! I know when I can use help and when It may not be of benefit to me. Even asking a friend for support can go a very long way. There’s something so valuable about being held in unconditional positive regard while going through something so challenging. There is non-judgmental, willing to help, empathetic, and insightful support out there. Your mental health matters! #BUILDMORETHANJUSTABODY with me using tons of my free resources or explore options for mentorship.
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 What are you doing now that the old, potentially soon to be gone, version of you would not be proud of or may even wish they didn’t spend so much time on?
1 thing for me is criticism of my body (not to be confused with pursuit of improvement with positive & focused intention) I used to wish my legs were smaller, stomach was flatter, arms weren’t as big, butt had more definition into legs & on & on… I feel bad for the younger version of myself who started dieting at such a young age, who judged her amazing legs, hid her stomach if it wasn’t starved for x hours, and didn’t participate in events due to self-consciousness with body & concern about food. If I could go back in time, would I change it? Probably not given what it taught me. But if I can use this to help others, I will! Something that helps me on not so great body image days is to recognize that my body unconditionally loves me and was built to keep me alive and sustain me no matter what the circumstance or variables. I find that it is easier to go from judgment to recognition than it is to go from judgment straight to love. Once I get to the state of gratitude for my body I can usually recognize the actions I take to support her and then I can start to see how amazing and beautiful my body is because of all we have been through together. I have learned to appreciate, accentuate, & embrace curves rather than hide them. I choose to see myself as powerful, strong, and persistent regardless of my body’s shape or size (which is ever evolving and changing, especially in bodybuilding) and I provide proof that this is true! Loving my body comes not just from how I see myself but how I treat & perceive myself I think of all the amazing things my body allows me to do and experience Sometimes throwing on an outfit (like this dress for instance) or listening to empowering music that makes you feel sexy can help boost your confidence too! What do you see when you look in the mirror? What do you want to believe about your body? How do you want to feel in your body? Now what is 1 thing you could change to support you in achieving this reality? Would love to hear all your answers 😍 . #BUILDMORETHANJUSTABODY  Standing on this stage 5 years ago I told my story of overcoming my mental health struggles & how I used fitness as a band-aid for a wound that needed stitches.
A suicidal, depressed, anxious version of me that felt helpless found so much control in living life with disordered eating & rigid exercise regimens. If I “couldn’t control” how I might feel at the end of the day, at least I could make myself a better athlete (volleyball player & jujitsu at the time I got into fitness) & I could “improve my body image & confidence” by changing my body shape. I was wrong. The fitness lifestyle & competing did not save me, but it did help show me what I really needed. After my 1st show, my problems were of heightened awareness & I was finally ready to face them. I had been to therapy for a short time when I was 18 (this was before my first show & before being aware of my rigid lifestyle habits) & it made a positive impact on my life. At the time, I didn’t know I’d eventually pursue a career in the mental health field, but I can say that I never forgot the value of having someone to offer new insights & encourage different thinking. I stopped feeling suicidal after an attempt that taught me & showed me in the moment that I was meant for more even if I didn’t know “what” yet. But I wanted to be proactive with my mental health & personal development from then on. I mended my relationship with food on my own after my first show in 2015, before immersing myself into more personal development in mid-late 2016. I hired business & personal development mentors, invested tens of thousands of dollars into myself & my vision, and made a commitment to myself for growth. I didn’t know how it would look but wow, it really was amazing and turned out even better than I imagined. I was a different person even when I was on this stage, in front of my biggest audience yet, sharing my story, than I am now. But a few things remains true… 1) life is worth living even when you feel hopeless & helpless, your purpose is boundless 2) if you have a persistent problem that is interfering with your life, get help 3) embracing impermanence allows for more growth #BUILDMORETHANJUSTABODY  I’ve come to realize that it is so easy to be caught up in being better and better that we forget to see we are worthy as we are now.
I found myself sometimes hiding at the thought of imperfections or anything less than previously met expectations or waiting until I am “even better” to “show” who I am. But life is worth living now and always. If you believe in yourself and who you’re becoming, carry yourself as such. A friend recently reminded me that I deserve to feel as confident as I do on stage every day and not just to practice each day for the moment of time in front of the judges who will tell me if my best is worthy of a placing that day but to carry myself like the stage version of celeste because I am so happy and confident and can tap into that energy without meeting the criteria of a “stage” body every day or without being on stage. And ultimately, this energy will only help me improve and focus on getting better in every facet of life. For years I’ve seen myself as a confident, bad ass, kind, and smart woman. I see myself as someone who has limitless potential and therefore always room for growth. I’m focusing on embracing the “in-between”. Which really is the most important thing. I love the process of going after my goals so much but I think in some ways I’ve held myself back from truly living or expressing that. I’m focused on being in a place where every day I can say to myself, ‘I may not be where I want to be yet, and some might say I was better before, but the truth is I am proud of where I am, what I’ve made it through, my achievements, and the life I’ve created thus far’ #BUILDMORETHANJUSTABODY #believeyourwaytobadass (you can find my best selling book on Amazon!)  Fixating on every change the scale reflects day to day, week to week, month to month will only cause problems.
If you trust the process, that means you inherently trust that the results will come, right? When people say “trust the process” it is just a short way of saying “trust that the process is getting you where you want to go in the long run”. If you question your process or are impatient you might be more likely to worry about a singular variable that gets way more credit than it deserves in your head. My clients and members have a group call every month and this last month we discussed detaching from the scale and changing how we think and interact with it. I understand the desires to see changes whether that’s weight gain or weight loss but letting it dictate your mood, perception of yourself, outlook on progress, or approach to the process will not help you! Especially if it leads to punishment or restriction or excess and sabotage of any sort. Your results will be a byproduct of the work you’re doing. If you’re working with a coach, let them worry about the process of getting you there! If you struggle with this, I have resources in the on-demand platform, including the replay of our group workshop at www.celestial.fit/ondemand. #BUILDMORETHANJUSTABODY  It makes me sad when competitors say they only love their prep body.
In prep you’re usually in a calorie deficit, uncomfortable, tired, and busy with all things cardio lifting and meals. This doesn’t change drastically into an improvement season but when you have more food, less cardio, more time, more flexibility, it makes a difference in how you feel. I have learned to love my improvement season body because I live in her more than my prep body. Sometimes it’s really uncomfortable, of course, but when you’re playing the long game, you have to be willing to feel that way. I have come to love my body more and more because I respect her. I respect that my body needs space to breathe and recover and grow. I respect that this sport is not about who can stay the leanest the longest, it’s about who can bring what the judges are looking for and stand out against everyone else on stage. I respect that I was too small at my last show, I don’t have the density and maturity others do, I need time. Because I respect these things, I have been able to embrace the necessary changes. I think it’s easy to get caught up in having “the look” but I remind myself that I’ll get “there” eventually, but now is still a season for growth and improvement. If I only loved my body on prep it would mean I wouldn’t get as much out of my improvement seasons because if you don’t love yourself, you’ll be less likely to take the actions necessary for yourself to improve or change. I don’t need to see alllllll the lines year round to know I’m an athlete. I’m an athlete regardless. I show up for myself, execute the plan, communicate my needs, and honor my body. I found validation in my efforts and my soul more than the body which allows me to excel. I can recognize where there’s room for more growth too & my efforts are supported by my gratitude for my body & this journey. When people message me saying they are so grateful I “post photos like this” or “looking like that” It used to kinda bother me but then I realized overtime that by me showing my body in all stages & phases, others are more comfortable with their own changing body. Take pride in your efforts all year & #BUILDMORETHANJUSTABODY 🧠  Bodybuilders are hypercritical & focused on their bodies because it’s literally the way this sport works.
You step on stage, you get judged to meet appearance based criteria, you go home. And if you compete again or plan to, every day is really focused on how to be better. Being better in this sport is directly attached to how you eat, train, sleep…which is not the best, but it is the reality. Then, strong associations are formed between you & specific behavior. That’s where things like “I should” or “I shouldn’t” come up along with thoughts of not being “good enough”. I don’t think that these risk factors need to keep you from competing, they just need to be considered before & during competing. How you see food, bodies, exercise, etc will change. If you’re not prepared to address concerning perspectives or distorted views along the way, it will be harder. Establish your perspective early on & be willing to change with it. An example: Your perspective could be that even though you eat xyz foods closer to a show, it does not mean abc foods are bad, it just means xyz foods were beneficial in that time…This can help to keep you from associating morality, worth, or judgment to food. Another example: Your perspective could be that your body is only worthy or loved or admired or nice to look at when you’re stage lean or in prep mode. This is dangerous for reverse dieting, making improvements, and being a healthy functioning person & athlete. A perspective shift might sound like “even though I love my prep body and the lines and how I fit into my clothing, I recognize this sport requires building, therefore I can thank my prep body and honor her by doing my best in improvement season to grow while keeping her healthy” this supports health & longevity. Last example: Your perspective could be that being a competitor in this sport requires laser focus but by setting aside everything that matters to you outside of this sport, including your own mental or physical or emotional needs, you end up hurting your chances of sustaining your competing career so prioritizing other identities is necessary to your success. Has your perspective on anything changed since competing?⬇️  I hope when people think of me they imagine me as happy as I look and was in this pic.
I truly try to keep a positive energy around me always. On days where I walk around with a smile all by myself and notice it, I actually feel so good. Not embarrassed to be smiling by myself or worried about how others may perceive it, but grateful that I have a smile on my face at all and that it is natural. I have had others’ sunshine warm me when my heart is cold and it has reminded me that when we feel good & grateful, we can help others feel this way, too. One of my favorite compliments to receive is that I look happy or I am making someone happier. In times when I’ve been really down and going through it, I didn’t receive that compliment and I missed it, but forcing a smile & pretending things are all hunky dory when you’re hurting isn’t fair to your soul either. Working through the pain, sitting with it, learning from it…finding your happy or contentedness again. Then I started to receive the compliment again and I was reminded of who I can be and am when I am healing, healthy, and happy. You don’t have to be perfectly at peace with everything in your life all the time, this would be an unfair expectation for happiness. But when you can be in gratitude for the present moment, living in more flow, it can relieve some of the pain that can take over and tell us life isn’t worth it. Even with death, sadness, pain, struggle, trauma, strife, heartache, illness…it is worth it to persevere. Thank you for capturing this @lenamarie.fitness 🥲 she got this after day 1 of the live #BUILDMORETHANJUSTABODY event when we got to workout at the @contestprepcenter 😍
Rather than shaming yourself for giving into excuses and denying yourself of the goals you say you want by self-sabotaging, try understanding where these limiting actions are stemming from.
When you get caught up in beating ourselves up and saying I am not good enough. I will never be a champion because of this. I am a failure. You are essentially perpetuating the self-sabotaging behavior because a person who thinks poorly of themselves often treats themselves poorly too. Step by Step: 1) recognize the pattern 2) identify when it comes up most frequently (this can lend insight into how you might break or predict the pattern) 3) address the root 4) try again but in a new way The only time anyone is ever a lost cause is when they have full heartedly decided it and would never even entertain the thought of being better. But most athletes live to be better. In fact, most people are fulfilled by striving. Have you listened to this full interview on @teamelitephysique and @ashleykfit Bikini and the Brain podcast? If not, you can find it on any streaming platform or watch it on YouTube! If you have, thank you for your support and I do hope you found it helpful #BUILDMORETHANJUSTABODY  Rather than focusing solely on what doing something brings you or the result it could create, try to focus on how the act of execution is beneficial.
I used to focus so much on the end result or the final goal but I would find myself missing the feeling of joy. It seemed fleeting because I was depending so much on the result. Whether it was a show date, a business goal, or school. I started becoming more present with what I was doing and this helped me to enjoy and embrace it more even when it is or was challenging. For example, I may not love the idea of a project for school, but I can recognize that doing it is supporting me in my program, giving me more perspective, and supporting me in using my time for growth. In bodybuilding, I don’t look at food as the vehicle to a physique, I look at it as nourishing, energizing, satisfying, etc for that day. I also look at my plan from my coach and identify how it’s benefitting me outside of a physique or future show or building muscle… This process and each day is so much more rewarding than anything else. Given so much in life can be unpredictable, I’m learning more and more to celebrate the actions I’m taking because that is ultimately what’s making up my life each day. What do you do to help you stay present? #BUILDMORETHANJUSTABODY Peep @theshoefairy_ 👀😍 discount code is “celeste” on their website! |
Celeste Rains-Turk
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