​Treat your body like the enemy, and it will always work against you. Treat your body like your ally and it will always work with you. 

MY REAL & RAW LIFE UPDATE...

I have been learning so much after my most recent show and am still learning as I go. One thing that’s for sure is I have found so much peace in taking time every day to write or think up statements like this, formulate beliefs that serve me, and transform any loatheful thoughts into loving ones.
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In order for me to be able to do what I love, my body has to begin functioning the way it’s meant to. If I don’t take care of myself with loving actions, thoughts, and belief patterns then it will not allow me to do what I love when I want to do it.
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I need to start decreasing my cardio, upping my food intake, and recomping my body without going so far that I’m doing a cut that kills me heading into another show.
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My body hasn’t had a menstrual cycle (period) in 2 years aside from one that was forced by my doctor with the prescription of progesterone for 10 days. This got my period to show up but then it was never to be found again lol. Even though this is pretty common and doesn’t necessarily mean problems for everyone, I still have to get it in check and my coach actually wants me to regulate it before I compete again.
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Now imagine for one second, you haven’t had your period in 2 years, you’re already up 10 pounds from stage weight (and advised not to go too much more), you are told you also need to begin packing on Muscle and decrease cardio (which will cause a shift likely to create recomp which is good but can require lots of self loving thoughts w some fat gain that comes with it), oh and you want to compete in February but with the way your body is functioning you have to regain hope and belief that your period will come back and regulate, your body fat will not surpass muscle growth in a way that creates more struggle than progress, and all this must be managed in a matter of a few short months...
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I am embracing this challenge as I go forward in my lifestyle and in my journey. More to come...more to share.

I’m learning to be more kind to myself, to be okay with the things I need to do, and begin treating what I have left untreated for so long. And reminding myself I am capable & everything is always working out as it’s meant to.
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I am finally seeing my doctor on Tuesday to get an action plan in place for what i shared in my last post. I am realizing that putting off treatment could now have hindered my growth and opportunity moving forward. This is my reminder for EVERYTHING In life, especially with all of this... to do the damn thing, the damn thing you know, in fact, every damn thing, and once the damn things are done, KEEP GOING!
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I have to accept what comes with the actions I NEED to take and take full responsibility knowing that if I don’t take them, I will only suffer the consequences moving forward.
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Now, listening, honoring, and loving my body is taking on a whole new meaning. I’m letting go of shame, guilt, comparison, and pride when it comes to the way I look, and remembering that this is MY life...all of this is up to me...I can’t let the demons take control.
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My mind needs so much TLC too, competing has been so much of my focus that after my last show a lot of my anxieties surfaced. I have decided to look for a therapist again since it’s been so long since I’ve seen mine and It helped me so much when I was depressed, suicidal, and anxious. There’s no shame in getting help!!! It’s better to acknowledge where help is needed than pretend things are ‘fine’ and eventually lose control / see it get worse...
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Now I must be mindful, through all of this; I MUST LOVE IN ORDER TO HEAL AND I MUST HEAL IN ORDER GROW AND I MUST GROW IN ORDER TO LIVE MY DREAMS.
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I feel the emotions, I feel them deeply, I still don’t have this all figured out. But I hope that by being real with you, you can see that I am human, I struggle, and I have to constantly address problems in my mind too...
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What’s your favorite way to overcome challenge and stimulate growth mentally, physically, & emotionally? Let’s support each other💜
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Last Saturday’s Competition was one of, if not the most, fun & fulfilling shows I have ever done. I felt different than I’ve ever felt at a show or on stage.
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It’s always interesting to me how everyone wants to know or cares more about how you place after a show versus how you feel. When people ask me how the show went I tell them it was amazing & the BEST most muscular and conditioned I’ve ever looked & i had NEVER been happier on stage or with my journey in this sport.
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Then they ask how i placed & it hits me that to me, it goes so much further than surface level fulfillment & it always will. Yes, I knew I earned my placing. But beyond that, this sport gives me so much more than awesome trophies/medals as I’ve shared countless times before.
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I am so grateful to be ending this season on a high note knowing I have given everything I could + more. I have been developing my physique & making adjustments with the coaching & support of Team EDGE


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This last weekend I brought my best physique I’ve ever brought which is the best reward I can experience as an athlete. Placing top 3 at this show was an honor with such a competitive class with amazing women & my coach reminded me that this is a huge accomplishment & that I DO have a competitive physique.
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I spoke with my coach Joe DiScuillo yesterday & he helped me put more into perspective as I reflected on the outcome of the weekend, my goals in the sport & the industry of fitness specifically, as well as where my head is at.
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We both know I have time on my side & since I’m in no rush, it can only benefit me moving forward as it really is about the lifestyle & embracing/LOVING every moment of this beautiful journey!
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I’m going to take the remainder of the year to build & improve so I can step on stage again in 2019! As many of you read in my last reflection post, I have become a new person & In life, we are all seeking personal/self fulfillment I am open to achieving & receiving that in any way it presents itself. I am forever grateful for the support of my coaches, family, friends, teammates, clients, & followers. Life is so exciting❤️😭

HELLOOO beautiful 🍪!! I would like to say THANK YOU... for following me, supporting my journey, pages & my business!

My wildest vision was born The moment fitness saved my life. I say saved for a reason...Facing depression & anxiety for years with fitness being my only treatment/bandage I found so much peace/healing in exercise. 

Unfortunately though, it was truly just a physical bandaid on a wound that needed stitches. I was suicidal & always in fear of if my depression would drive me into a wall, hang me from the ceiling, or drown me in a tub of water. I had no idea what to do about it so I relied upon fitness to patch me up.

I was seeing such amazing physical results but something was still missing...I developed a very unhealthy relationship with food & exercise & even though I live such an amazing life & was happier in my body shape... I was still depressed.

How could this be? I thought my cure was in the weights + obsessive restriction of food? 

THAT’S when I realized something...Fitness is about Building More than Just a Body...THAT was the moment I discovered my purpose. I was already a personal trainer & I already had my own business going but I always wanted to give people MORE.

But I needed to heal a lot for myself. So I focused on the root of the problem...self-loathing thoughts & behavior patterns. I found ways to love myself through actions, intentions, & beliefs! 

I became so invested in personal development+self discovery that out of the DARKEST times of my life came to be what I know to be my souls purpose...

I want to eradicate self-loathe on the planet. It is my belief that the more we love ourselves, the more love we radiate out, & thus, the more we can receive! I believe that w/ self-love anything we desire can come to us from a place of ease/flow because when we love ourselves so much we are naturally inspired to move & fuel our bodies or pursue our goals in ways that help us have the most EPIC human experience.

I’m not just passionate about exercise & nutrition. I am passionate about coaching people w/ an emphasis on the importance of self-love, mindset, behavior change modification, & wellness development ALLLL coming together with a training & nutrition lifestyle that works for YOU, your goals, + your body’s needs!

I appreciate you being here, following me, & even reading this. It helps me to carry my method/philosophy of Building more than just a Body further & wider to help more souls

💝🦋💪🏻😄

I created a printable with 18 ways to love yourself on it that includes some of my MOST favorite ways, HERE for you to download for free. I hope you love it as much as my clients and I do❤️
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"I am so happy and grateful for my transformation and happy for hers too"
This came out of me while journaling in gratitude this morning. 
I was really connecting to a feeling and just writing as gratitude flowed through me and I almost crossed this out because I thought, "who is this 'her'?"
Then I realized. That 'her' is my soul.
I am happy and grateful that my soul has transformed with me. 
That she's shown herself. 
That she's opened up. 
That she's appeared in the world and is standing up for herself and her beliefs. 
That she's healthier. 
That she's more free. 
That she's happier.
The crazy thing? 
I didn't consciously think to write this down. 
I consciously thought to scratch it out as a mistake.
I then realized who really wrote this...
My soul took control and decided that she belongs in every aspect of my life.
I thought she had. 
She thought differently.
So she showed up and she made it known that she deserves to be recognized and acknowledged.
I fought the idea thinking, well technically she is me. But this was just to cover up the truth that sometimes my soul and I have space between us that's filled with a bunch of emotion either serving or limiting.
And this was her way of letting me know, "I am here. I transformed with you. Be grateful for me because I am grateful for you."
So it hit me.
When I would and do feel intertwined with my soul it is natural.
When I am only acting from my headspace I do not feel 'one' with her but rather like we are just holding hands on the journey.
That's it.
It's not only about knowing my soul is apart of me and choosing to sometimes showcase her or listen to her or become her.
It's about truly recognizing that she and I are the same. 
Every day. 
Every minute. 
Every decision. 
She's been here.
And I am grateful that she has transformed with me. Even when I neglected her consciously I took the time to connect with her when I felt that I was neglecting her.
This was a beautiful reminder to not just 'connect' with her. But to become her. And truly embody her. Because she is me at the deepest rooted level there is.
I am grateful she naturally came out of me today without me even consciously realizing immediately what happened until she stopped me from crossing it out and I took a deep breath and saw it for what it really was and felt her strong presence actually flow out of me, naturally.
This would never happen if I didn't recognize her power and love and abilities and strength and spirt.
Because I have. She has too.
We are transformed together. 
We are no longer just connected every now and then. 
We now seek oneness over connectivity. Because oneness allows us to show up together consciously and unconsciously;naturally.
❤ Your Soul and she will ❤ you back more deeply than you ever knew possible.
Xx
Building More Than Just a Body

[Vulnerably emotional share]
"No thought, just feel" 
Closing my eyes again I reconnected to my heart and discovered pain which I had repressed for so long and convinced myself it was 'not my pain to feel' despite its immense affect on my life, my beliefs, my choices, and my overall well-being.
I have always known I was afraid of being alone, loneliness, or loss of connection. I knew I had a lot to work through; there was healing to be done.
I always keep things real here and I want you to know, despite the way I show up online, I actually don't have a ton of close friends. And I haven't felt very 'connected' to people in person in a very long time aside from my boyfriend.
There are not a lot of people I can call out of the blue and open up fully to, or at least I haven't allowed myself too (I am going to get into this). My boyfriend is my closest friend of all but I don't really have more then 2 close girl friends who I feel I can really turn to.
This has been hurting my heart lately as I have felt so reliant on myself and I felt so distant from others, even family.
While I recognized this and came to many of my own conclusions I never opened up to the depth of which this pain and this problem stemmed from...
"I sense you still have some depression"
"Do you often get a sore throat or a cough?"
"I am getting sadness and grief around your heart..."
"...Does any of this resonate with you?"
Me: I don't feel that depressed anymore but when I do it is triggered by the potential of losing someone or something or me wanting to run from a confrontation that could cause this in fear of it happening. I don't normally get a sore throat or cough, no. Sadness and grief in my heart, I am not sure.
I knew what was happening. He was tapping into the energies with my chakras.
Then, we went deep. 
Shit got real, real fast. 
Heartache was uncovered.
Attachment was released.
And 3 beliefs were woven into me from all of the breakthroughs and deep discussion through the healing process: 
1. It is safe to trust
2. It is safe to love
3. It is safe to forgive
I am still sitting with all of this but I feel so much more open and light after this healing session.
I realize that cutting the ties between these 2 significant people's energies to forgive them is going to allow me to be more open in life to receive.
Wow? Sound familiar, Celeste? Just yesterday I did a video on "What do you need to release in order to receive what you truly desire?"
Apparently, I too needed to do a lot of releasing, we all do though.
I had to release energy that was not serving me and which I had pent up in what I have always been told to be my strongest chakra--my heart. I couldn't hold that there if I wanted to show up as my highest self...
I feel more open to: 
--New friendships (deep ones)
--Loving new people in my life deeply and strongly without the fear of losing them or going through all the fallouts I used to have. 
--Forgiving more freely and openly with loads of acceptance and true objectivity.
The past month the word "healing" has been coming up a lot for me. Then all these different types of healings have showed up for me, of course.
Today I was grateful to be guided through a Theta Healing Session with Mike Marschhausen. I appreciated his willingness to go all in with me and to create a space for me in which I felt open, comfortable, and confident in sharing deeply so I could heal.
While I am still getting my bearings after the session, I can say I feel there was a necessary shift which occurred for me, which I cannot deny or neglect.
I highly recommend you reach out to Mike and ask him about his Theta Healing. In all honesty, I didn't even know what it was, I just did it. And, I don't think I could even explain it now if I tried! All I can say is massive energetic healing.
Any action towards bettering yourself, your life, your body, your health, and your relationships is an act of self-love.
Every day I have the blessing and privilige of helping others live a life rooted more deeply in self-love while truly freeing themselves from self-loathe.
To care for yourself, to allow yourself to heal, to truly understand and listen to yourself, that is self-love.
When we look at the world we can all have very different perspectives. I respect them all. I find that perspective is highly based on your beliefs, your mindset, and the energy and love in your own heart and soul.
I truly believe that the more love we have for ourselves then the more love we can radiate out into the world and thus, the more love we can receive.
Any amount of outwardly, worldy, universal 'peace' must first come from inner peace.
I invite you to join me on my Self-Love Creation and Self-Loathe Liberation workshop.
All the information is on the page which I am linking in the comments below; you can register there too!
10% of every registration will be donated to YMCA-Miller Family and Big Brothers Big Sisters of Ventura County
I can't wait to see you there...
<3
P.S. If you felt touched by the story I shared and feel like you could really use some in depth healing around this I again encourage you to reach out to Mike Marschhausen he specializes in Theta Healing and does it full time. If you need me to connect you to him I can or just message him on your own :)
Xx,
Celeste Rains-Turk
Celeste Rains-Turk: Celestial_fit

I chose self love when...
--I gave up the things which no longer lit me up inside.
--I stopped after one suicide attempt.
--I demanded I go to therapy.
--I snuck out of a verbally abusive relationship.
--I stopped hanging out with people who didn't care even half as much about me as I did them.
--I sat in my car alone at lunch in high school to protect myself from negative energy and feelings I was left with. 
--I stopped putting up with men cheating on me or lying to me.
--I looked in the mirror and chose to start taking care of my body. 
--I turned down party invites which made me feel hurt and uncomfortable
--I stopped allowing people to guilt trip me into doing things for them or 'because they needed me' when in reality they just didn't feel comfortable on their own and would ignore or neglect me when they felt comfortable. 
--I stopped putting up with an environment full of people who didn't 'get' me. 
--I started my health and fitness journey and got a job as a coach to pay for my gym membership
--I started sleeping more and adjusted my schedule after almost crashing my car from nearly nodding off to sleep
--I started cooking healthy meals and pushing my body past its limits.
--I stopped allowing people to make me feel obligated and started allowing myself to trust what I truly felt and gave myself the power to say no. 
--I allowed myself to realize I had an unhealthy relationship with food even when I was at my most fit physique. 
--I allowed myself to heal.
--I invested over $30k in my personal development in one year. 
--I wanted to rest and sleep instead of going to the gym because I knew I'd be too out of it to even benefit.
--I listened and trusted my heart and quit a sport I played for my whole life and even signed to play in college so I could pursue what truly made me happiest. 
--I continuously follow what makes me happiest, not what is 'right' to others. 
--I allowed myself to love and be loved completely
--I focused on my bodies health and function over its look and shape. 
--I could have given everything up and gone the 'easy' way which in my mind would have been so much harder.
I don't need to continuously go on and share EVERY time I chose self love. Because, the truth is, I choose self love everyday, in every moment. 
No, it is not always easy. 
And yes, I do sometimes fail. 
No, it does not require painful work. 
Yes, it does require deep healing, releasing, liberation and creation. 
No, it doesn't have to wait until x,y,or z happens. 
Yes, you can love yourself RIGHT NOW.
It comes down to a choice. A decision. An identity shift that you are no longer a person who loathes, rather you are a person who loves.
I am hosting a Self-Love Creation and Self-Loathe Liberation workshop. 
We will be diving deep into: 
---Releasing Self-Loathe
---Discovering More ways to Love Yourself
---The Difference Between Affirmations and Actions and how to find a Healthy Balance between the two which Supports your growth.
---Digging Deep into WHY it's important to love yourself more for YOU not my why, or so and so's why, YOUR why.
---Daily Mindset Ritual to Align with your Souls inner beauty and warmth while setting you up for a successful day. 
---Specific Self-Love exercises will be walked through during this live workshop
There will also be time for questions of course!
This will be fun, exciting, deep, and potentially quite revealing for yourself.
I am so excited for the people who have already enrolled and locked in their spot.
This workshop would normally run for $97 but I am offering it for $20 for the next 6 days because I want to empower as many people to join as possible so we can empower others since 10% of every registration will be donated to the YMCA-Miller Family and Big Brothers Big Sisters of Ventura County
If you know this is something you could really use right now, why hold back any longer? 
It is no coincidence this opportunity was placed in front of you today...
You can join here: https://celeste-rainsturk.clickfunnels.com/self-love-creation-and-self-loathe-liberation-workshop-registration
FYI: This is a LIVE workshop which will be held in on Sunday, February 5th at 2 pm PST but will be designed so you can access it anytime be it through a replay a few hours later or 5 years from now when you want to revisit it and dive deep again.