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Eating Problems I Used to Have that Others are Embarrassed to Admit to Me

October 13, 20232 min read

celeste sitting in a chair

⏰wake up at 12am & stay up until 11:59pm eating all day as my “cheat day” then hardly eating during the week

🥗 choosing the healthiest thing in front of others to uphold this “fit” identity only to go home & binge on everything else I could find or stop for treats on the way home

🍩order extra donuts so I could eat all of them & still have a full box for others

🤫sneak food from the bulk stash in the garage because then no one would notice I ate it

🙅🏻‍♀️say I was full because everyone else was done eating only to then think about food the rest of the meal

🐿️pack a bunch of food I wanted to eat post show or that was limited edition to shove down throat after finals

🗑️trashing food I was afraid to binge on only to grab it back & eat it swearing to never buy it again

👩🏻‍⚖️judge myself for eating something others would deem as bad but also judging myself for not being able to have control

😏use “going on prep” or “going on a diet” as my excuse to be able to turn down food I was afraid to be around

🥣sneak bites of food out of everything my fam was cooking after telling them I’d have my own but all I wanted was to be able to eat what they were having

🥸mask that I hadn’t eaten all day just to be able to “afford” a meal out

🤥tell people I already ate when really I just couldn’t figure out or have the energy to go out & risk not being “perfect” on plan

✍🏻only log food I wanted to take responsibility for eating but then feel guilty knowing I didn’t log everything

🤰🏻eat myself so uncomfortably full that even laying down was hard

📺use tv as a means to curb cravings for foods by watching all sorts of food network shows even while doing cardio

🏃🏻‍♀️force myself to complete exercise before & after eating anything

✂️cut out major foods in an effort to create a false sense of control & peace of mind

I share some of what I did in hopes of reducing shame & to be an example that you can get through it & be so far removed from these behaviors that it becomes a distant memory for you like it has for me

Learn more & apply to work with me at @celestial_fit ❤️

Celeste Rains-Turk

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Celeste Rains-Turk; Celestial_fit

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